Session Soul Survivor
How Thirteen Unlikely Mentors Helped My Faith Survive the Church
by Phillip Yancey

Henri Nouwen

Section Internet Links Back to Index
Wayne's Presentation after the Nouwen Video: Staight From the Heart - The Life of Henry Nouwen.

Several years ago, I developed a short article for the readers of Pneuma a journal for spiritual directors and formation leaders of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in Canada. The ELCIC web site for Lift Up Your Hearts http://www.worship.ca/ contains this piece and many other articles on the subject of spirituality.

HENRI NOUWEN'S CONTRIBUTION TO SPIRITUALITY
"The parable of the prodigal son is a story that speaks about a love that existed before any rejection was possible and that will still be there after all rejections have taken place." -- Henri Nouwen, The Return of the Prodigal Son
Like many hundreds, perhaps thousands, of people, I believe I had a personal friendship with Henri Nouwen. At a special family happening, Henri sent a present, with a letter enclosed, stating: " . . . I am sending you my latest book (The Return of the Prodigal Son) as . . . a gift. Be sure of my love and prayers." As much as this remembrance will be treasured, I know Henri treated many people in a similar fashion.

On another significant occasion, Henri prayed with me and a few intimates concerning a profound struggle with which I was contending. His personal appeal to readers through his forty-plus volumes and those he attended to one-on-one or addressed in small or large groups made him a very popular pastor and spiritual master.

Yet, this man of many contacts and friends suffered often from bouts of extreme loneliness and depression. Robert A. Jonas, a psychotherapist, spiritual director, and close associate, says that Nouwen had a neurotic desire for affirmation and a great need to be needed. He lived a prolonged,co-dependent relationship with his mother and repressed considerable anger at his strong-willed, distant father. He felt that neither of his parents acknowledged or understood his rich emotional life. As a result, much of his writing was an attempt to work through significant feelings of rejection. He often felt freer to share openly with his readers than with his own family. He struggled with his sexuality. Only gradually, in later years, did he become more comfortable with his own body. His habits were sometimes eccentric and his behaviour frenetic.

How could this afflicted soul simultaneously become a major influence for good in the lives of so many? Deeply embedded in him was the personally discovered truth that every Christian's journey is a process. It is necessary to "leave home" and to develop one's own spiritual life. It is also frequently necessary to "come home again," a changed person, to share communally the fruitfulness and fecundity that was gained.

Here briefly are the key contributions Nouwen shares with those in ministry. He learned them through intense engagement with his own Christian vocation.

From Pastoral Psychology to Spiritual Theology

Nouwen began his career as one extensively trained in the field of psychology. He studied with some of the great pastoral psychologists on both sides of the Atlantic. Early on he left his Dutch homeland and established himself in North America. He discovered that much ministry training of clergy and lay persons alike followed professional models developed in the social sciences. He grew convinced that a major gift the Church could offer the world were "wounded healers" spiritually reformed by the truths of their faith and the life of Jesus. Therapy could evolve into a healing ministry open to all in Christ's family.

From Elitist Individualism to Spiritual Community

Nouwen spent long periods of his career teaching about spirituality in famous academic institutions such as Notre Dame, Yale, and Harvard. Many of his early books grew out of lectures, sermons, and presentations made to students in highly competitive environments. Over time, he became dissatisfied with what was happening to him spiritually. He believed that many of our institutions, including the church, were reflecting values of upwardly- mobile, self-centred people. Nouwen left the academy, eventually finding his family with mentally dysfunctional adults in L'Arche. In community, Nouwen truly blossomed.

From Protected Ministry to a Vocation of Risk

Nouwen discovered that, when he was willing to let go of the securities of profession, status, and former influence, he grew better able to find a certain solace for his conflicted heart. He discovered a solitude through which he could experience intimacy and acceptance from others. While he would never discount the importance of professional development for the young, he grew to find healing in his own life by gradually giving up his need for assurance in terms of this world's career protection and allowing the irony of "downward mobility" to give meaning and purpose to his maturing ministry.

After years of struggling with a gnawing sense of being disowned, Nouwen's search for a spiritual home and the answer to rejection led him, during the last decade of his life, to find a peace and a vocational congruency that had evaded him previously. His spirituality was always a work- in-progress, but his legacy is nonetheless a rich one.

Henri Nouwen taught us to honour our wounds and to look more intently to the spiritual resources of our Christian faith for healing; to move beyond our society's focus on individualism to places where spiritual community might release newfound gifts and energies; and to venture a leap of faith, a vocational risk that prevents us from trying to be safe or to protect what we think we possess.
"The more I think about the human suffering in our world and my desire to offer a healing response, the more I realize how crucial it is not to allow myself to become paralyzed by feelings of impotence and guilt. More important than ever is to be very faithful to my vocation to do well the few things I am called to do and hold on to the joy and peace they bring me. I must resist the temptation to let the forces of darkness pull me into despair and make me one more of their many victims. I have to keep my eyes fixed on Jesus and on those who followed him and trust that I will know." -- Henri Nouwen

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St. David's United Church.Calgary, Alberta, Canada

January 2005